Monday, November 26, 2012

Journals. All 14 of them.

Found this weekend at my parents: ALL of the journals I thought I'd previously lost. Book after book (14 all together!) filled with my writing from 5th grade through college. So grateful to have these back in my life!

I finally found my box of journals while at my parents' home this weekend. I had been distraught for some time now, thinking I'd lost them somewhere along the way but lo and behold, there they were in my old closet, buried in the bottom of a box. I spent a good three hours poring over each and every word I wrote in them, books full of my words from 5th grade all the way through college- 14 journals all together. It's so remarkable to me that I wrote so consistently for so long, even after getting into Livejournal and beyond. Half of it is heart-breakingly honest and real and beautiful, and the other half makes me cringe with embarrassment at my naive and very boy-crazy self. But it's me, all of me, wrapped up in journal after journal, page after page, full of tucked away photos and movie tickets and cards from old friends. So grateful to have those back in my life. And so grateful to be able to read through those with such open eyes, and have thoughts like these: why on earth did I waste so much time thinking I was fat? How could I think that so-and-so was really interested in me? (it was astounding to read my recaps of situations in those pages and then read my interpretations of them! I was crazy!) Also: it's laughable how I was "so in love" with this guy one week, then the next some new guy was "the one." Insane, insane, preteen and teenage me. Thank god for growing up and figuring it out...or at least a little more than I had by that point.


xoxo

31 comments:

  1. Yay to finding old journals! I would be so upset if mine had gone missing! I love looking back at old journals! Such a different perspective with hindsight and everything. I love journaling because its usually leads me to clarity that I'm looking for. I've got to work on journaling the normal days, not just the super big events and important life moments.

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  2. So fun! I feel the exact same way about my journals - they make me cringe but I love reading them. So cool that you preserved your life through those times! :)

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  3. I spent so much time on my journal when I was in high school. I love looking back and seeing the pictures and reading how ridiculous I was. It's a lot of fun to look back.

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  4. ahh I have a box filled with old journals too :) A lot of it is really sad (I had a sad childhood I guess...broken family), but other stuff is just so cute and funny and then of course there's the stuff that makes me cringe...ahh. I love writing and I'm so glad I've always kept journals.

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  5. I can truly relate to this, Danielle. I have a ton of old journals, as well. They make me laugh, cry, cringe, shake my head and even nod in agreement. It's fascinating to look back and see how I've grown. However, I'm not sure what I ultimately want to do with them. I'm not sure I ever want anyone else to read them!

    Thanks for a thoughtful little post I can relate to!

    Alison : )

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  6. aw, i love this post! i love coming across old journals. it's like a coffee date with your younger self. i have kept a journal since the 1st grade, so yeah - i know about the cringe-worthy and the laughable and the painful moments that i stumble across when i read mine. so precious and priceless!

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  7. That's amazing that you kept them all. It's so nice to have a record of your younger self.

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  8. I do that too, I filled seven of them with my words and can't wait to be older and look back :) So nice!

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  9. I cannot bear to read my old diaries! They make me cringe way too much! x

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  11. reading old journals is always so wonderful. you know i used to keep my writings inside coconut shell and burry it under ground behind the cattle feed stack when i was a kid. and then after almost 17 years i found them when the house was under reconstruction. the feeling made goose bumbs.

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  12. Aww this is lovely. I stumbled acro my old livejournal the other day (I know...I know) and wa a riot reading them. I was the best/worst person ever, and so many daft wee things I forgot! x

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  13. oh my gosh. i stumbled upon some of my journals about six months ago. when i was 12, i had wrote something about sending off to a magazine for a 'love potion.' you should post some of the embarrassing ones on your blog! i did, and it was kind of comforting to have other people come out and say they were just as boy crazy and insane as i was at 14. :)

    here is my embarrassing journal post if you'd like to see it:

    http://delirious-rhapsody.blogspot.com/2012/04/not-so-brilliant-mind.html

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  14. I know exactly how you feel, I found mine from when I was 14-18 last year and spent so long reading them and I couldn't believe how boy crazy I was, I honestly don't remember being that bad but I've written it all down. So much of it makes me cringe but most of it makes me smile and I had to phone my friends to tell them about the memories I had unearthed! I'm so glad you found them, I'd be so upset if I hadn't kept mine!

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  15. oh that's one of my favorite things to do! old journals are so fun to read :)

    glad you found them!

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  16. Aaaaaaaghhh! I recently wrote up a post about rediscovering my teeny bop diaries as well! I even found Garbage Pail Kids stickers and an old "sneak out" plan inside! Check it out, for a good laugh. Isn't it crazy to remember all the silliness of yesteryear? :) http://www.frommyhearthtoyours.com/2012/10/dear-diaryyoure-embarrassing.html

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  17. Isn't it great! I have been writing in a journal since I was 8 years old and love looking back at them! Although, I had a crazy moment where I burned several journals covering the course of 3 years, 500 pages total, all to get over a boy I dated in my teens. Now looking back, I wished I had saved them to keep the memories and laugh at myself.

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  18. Oh god. I always get flustered rereading my own journals from when I was younger. So embarrassing and hilarious.

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  19. That is so funny! I also have journals that I wrote in as a little girl, I need to go back and find them. "Soulmates", math class and everything in between. I'll be home this weekend and will on a quest to find them. Thanks!

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  20. This is great! I wish I did this in my teens because writing things down makes the events so vivid! I started keeping a journal two years ago when I wrote down funny things my kids would say and I look back at this now and crack up! I mean just looking at the things my son said at two and comparing it to what he says now that he is four...its just awesome to have these memories!

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  21. Ha! I've got all my journals too. Totally embarrassing but also heartbreaking. I'm still so glad I have them.

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  22. i just got my journals from my parent's house too! i missed writing in it, but now i have so much to catch up on! i've been writing in journals since i was 8 :) they are so fun to read back on

    andrea brionne
    @thedailyeverythings.blogspot.com

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  23. This is just amazing! I'm always so surprised when I read my old diaries. I mean it's really crazy to see how much I have changed and grown :)x

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  24. that's amazing wish i would kept mine, but they were burned throw the years, maybe this two i will keep :)

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  25. Haha :) I have a box of these at my mom's somewhere too. I was pretty boy crazy too and in love with a new one all the time. Ha! I'm glad those days are over :) I still keep a journal. I've probably got 6-7 just from the past few years. I love them ♥Lindsay

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  26. What a treasure you found! I never journaled much, but I recently re-found my old Livejournal from my freshman year of college and it is amazing and so embarassing! It wasn't even that long ago, which is the funny part to me...

    Strive to Thrive,
    Nic
    www.Thriving-Wives.com

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  27. Not too long ago I uncovered the same thing: a tub filled to the brim with journals from my past. It is a humbling experience to revisit old feelings. I love that you did a post about this!

    ♥ Naomi {Starry Eyes + Coffee Cups}

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  28. I remember seeing you post this picture on IG and thinking that is so awesome that you have the gift of writing. That it was already ingrained in you at the age of 14! Thats wonderful that you were able to find your journals. Im still having my step mom keep an eye out for mine, but I think after moving from Connecticut, Florida, California, North Carolina and Virginia all within 10 years I've lost some along the way. But I still have hopes I have them in my grandmas attic somewhere :-)

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  29. I so wish that I would have kept journals all my life. But I was never good at it and didn't know how to put things into words so I would write a random page here and there and give up. It would have been so nice to have all those. I am making that my goal for 2013, to journal constantly. So that I can start saving those special moments and little things so I won't forget.

    Glad you were able to find them!

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  30. Hah! They are too good. They looks so very beautiful, I like them. they make me want to read your article even more! thanks!cheapest runescape gold, buy cheap rs gold.

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