Wednesday, March 5, 2014

Beginning/Middle/End

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What to do when you don't have an appropriate photo to go with a post? My answer: stick a cloud photo in it. ;)


Where are you right now? Sometimes I like to take a step back and really look at everything that's going on and the other day I got into a conversation with a friend about where we were. I'm the kind of person who always feels like I'm in the middle of something, but when I look a little more closely I can see lots of beginnings, and some ends too. Right now we're at the start of this whole new busy season of our lives. I realized this when Charlie and I dropped off Henry at preschool, ran off to run errands, popped home to go on a run, only to get us back in the car again to pick Henry up again. The days are flying by, and I can only imagine how much crazier it must feel with older children and much fuller days. We're at the first of them, with a million more stretched out in front of us. So many other beginnings too- new friends, new projects, new motivation to be better. Spring does that to me. It makes me feel like anything is possible; like I am able to start again and be renewed.

It's crazy that Charlie has already been here for 6 months, and that adds to the feeling of beginnings. He's just starting to do all of these things- almost crawling, kind of talking, just getting so much bigger. And there's an end in there too, you know. The end of the baby days. And that's hard for me. Hank and I would love to have more children but in reality, you never know what will happen. Maybe we won't be able to get pregnant again? Maybe life's circumstances change? You never, ever know. So I always kind of keep that in the back of my mind, that these days could be the last of those cooing, giggling, wide-eyed first months.

And I think about being in the middle of all of it too. I'll be turning 32 in 2 months and although I feel like I'm still so young, I know I'm getting closer to the middle of my life. Isn't that a weird thought? Not there yet, but much closer to the middle than to the beginning. Although if we want to get into it we actually have no idea if we're at the middle or maybe even close to the end, right? But that's whole different post. I also think with middles it's sometimes hard to know when you're in it, because the whole world is going by so fast and to notice a middle means you have to be aware enough to hit pause and see everything for what it is.

So yes. Beginnings and middles and ends. I've been in one of my self-reflective moods lately which always brings about posts like this and long talks about life with Hank. I partially love it but sometimes I kind of wish I was someone who didn't think about so much, so much. I have a few friends like that, who are much more just "whatever" about things- much more laid-back in attitude, and I admire that quality. The grass is always greener though, right?

If you have a moment, tell me where you are. Do you have some beginnings happening? Middles or ends?

xoxo

20 comments:

  1. I'll turn 42 this year and I can honestly say that I feel like I'm at the beginning. The beginning of where I'm content and happy with what I'm doing in my life. Sometimes I wish I would of "been here" about 20 years ago. The trials and tribulations of life I guess. Here's to moving forward and all the fun that lies ahead. Great post!

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  2. Interesting perspective, but it makes sense. There are so many beginnings, middles and ends going on for us. I have a hard time letting go of some of the ends, and have been struggling with that lately. We moved to Portland four years ago from upstate New York with the promise of my in laws eventually following us (grandchildren are a strong pull!). They decided right before Sadie was born to not move out here, and in October they moved to Florida to be near my mother in law's parents. It's been nearly six months, and the end of that dream is still really bothering me. The end of the idea of the great support they provide being local. The end of the dreams that Sean had of rebuilding a car or a motorcycle with his dad. It's so hard to let go sometimes, but the end of this 3+ year plan is really standing in my way lately. I guess I need to look at the beginnings going on, and try to get excited about where our family of five is heading. Spring being right around the corner will help me in a big way.

    I love your rambling-ish posts--totally brings me back to my own livejournal days. I probably would have loved yours, ha! I do hope that there are more babies in your future if that's what you and Hank want. You make some good looking babies, and I think that you are a great mom.

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  3. I'm currently at the end of my college career. It also happens to be the middle of my student teaching experience as an art teacher. Its been a whirlwind eight weeks and its bringing about a lot of reflection and questions about what I feel my path is for in the future. Which also means, I am about to enter the real world. That is a whole new beginning for me. At the moment, it makes me anxious because of uncertainty- but it also is exciting because so many new chances in the world are going to be opening! This is the life of a 21 year old. Beginnings, Middles, and Ends

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  4. I always feel like I'm in the middle of everything, but I do love when I actually recognize beginnings and ends because it's easier to savor them than middles. I love this post- it's making me think about the beginnings, middles and ends happening in my life right now, which I don't ever really stop to do!

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  5. This is a wonderful post, and also a really interesting and wonderful way to look at things. Life is full of beginnings, middles, ends, and it seems as though whenever an inevitable end is coming, a beginning is right around the corner, and without even realizing it, we are right in the middle of something else. Right now I am exactly in the middle of being 26, in the middle of becoming engaged and soon getting married, in the middle of making plans to start a family and a new life with my soon to be husband. I am at the beginning of a new chapter of my life as a wife and a hopefully soon to be mother. I'm at the beginning of finally finding out what my true passions are, and beginning to work towards achieving them. And I am also at the end of some friendships, the end of the transition between finishing a university degree and beginning to work towards a career, and most importantly the end of being critical of myself and beginning to work towards positivity and self-love. So yes, I definitely believe that life is a series of beginnings, middles, and ends, and I wouldn't have it any other way.

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  6. I totally understand this. "Thinking too much" isn't a bad thing, it's a gift. Embrace it <3 xo

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  7. Oh, man. That 'third child' talk makes me question where I am on a daily basis. Do I want to be at the end of being a full time mama, saying goodbye to my years of nursing my babies to health and being their primary caregiver? Or would I rather be at the beginning of a new chapter with another baby, happily knowing that I am the only one who can nourish them? Or somewhere in the middle? Gah! I don't know!

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  8. What a mental image, pushing pause while in the middle, everything swirling past you. Incredible.

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  9. This year was a lot of beginnings, middles, and endings for me. It marked the end of college and beginning of my life in the "real world". I graduated in May, and it was very strange to end that chapter of my life. Such a fun chapter, with so many amazing memories, but the time had come and the fours years ended. After an end, of course comes a beginning, and so came the start of my time in the next chapter. Working everyday, building my career, and shifting focus from the school mentality to a working mentality. Still being so young, only 22, but having to adjust to a very adult life. Definitely the biggest transition yet! At first that end and beginning were so difficult because it was so drastic and so fast, but after nine months, I am finally in a place where I can appreciate this new chapter and all of the excitement it brings! Looking back over the past months at this beginning, I realize have grown so much and I am able to reflect and appreciate this new place in life. I think that's what beginnings, middles, and endings help us to do. We grow and reflect and appreciate so that we can recognize those chapters of life, those special happy moments while we're in them. Just some sharing :) Thanks for this post!

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  10. I am expecting my first baby in about 5 weeks, so looking at the end of something and the beginning of something else amazing. My pregnancy, which felt like forever back in the fall, now seems to have flown by. I am excited for this new chapter.

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  11. I completely feel you on this post! My husband and I are just reaching the end of our first year abroad together- which in actuality, just means the beginning of a new location for us, and the middle of our journey! Thank you for sharing this post, it is a great reflection!

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  12. Such a lovely post, I can't wait to experience the family life in my future, its all i Look forward too!

    www.skinandroses.blogspot.co.uk

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  13. I am right there with you! I love to acknowledge how I am simultaneously living within beginnings/middles/endings. We are about to bring our first child (son!) into the world next month, and inevitably we will be closing the door to our singularity as humans. Building a family is a beautiful prospect on the horizon, but just as terrifying for us newbies, in our late 20's we have just gotten our feet rooted. It seems as if there are so many doors placed alongside our path now, and I am having to remind myself on the daily to stop and breath in the right now - also that seems to be the BEST piece of advice I've received from parents thus far! Nonetheless, being at the tail end of my 20's has also brought so much perspective and growth, and very soon I'll be welcoming my thirties :) Change is a very refreshing thing to take notice of, and I love your post as a reminder!

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  14. My first baby just started walking, a beginning and an end. I actually just wrote about it here:

    http://alsothatsit.blogspot.com/2014/03/commencement.html

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  15. Right now I feel like I'm in the middle of so many things, but also on the verge of one or two beginnings and endings. As our baby girl gets older and older (she's 4 months) I'm hit with the sadness of knowing that she will be my last baby, so I try to take advantage of each day, but I still have that heavy feeling in my heart because part of me really doesn't want her to be my last. At the same time my husband and I are both trying to figure out what we want to do with our lives and are on the verge of hopefully ending our current jobs and getting new ones or being bold and moving and starting over.

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  16. I love this post. I feel like I'm at the beginning of so many things, the middle of so many others, and the end of some more. It's happy and sad and wonderful all at the same time.

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  17. You write so beautifully and this rings so true with me right now...you state it perfectly. I find myself at so many beginnings, middle and ends and I feel I am approaching a crossroad between a professional end and a new personal beginning. Much internal conflict going on but trying to enjoy the journey and embrace it all as I figure it out. I'm a creature of habit and am apprehensive to making big changes, but in that lies growth. Thank you for the reminder that when one door closes, new ones can open.

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  18. I loved this post and it led to me taking some time to really think about where I am. Thanks for the reminder to take a few moments to reflect on life's ever-changing phases.

    http://somethinglikeflying.wordpress.com/

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  19. I envy people who are "whatever" about things, as that will never be me. I always feel like I am in the 'middle' of something. Thanks for giving me a reminder to reflect on truly where I am at!

    Aimee Burton :)

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  20. "I kind of wish I was someone who didn't think about so much, so much. I have a few friends like that, who are much more just "whatever" about things"

    Oh Danielle, me too. Me too. I think often about this, especially in these last days.

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