Tuesday, August 15, 2017

On the Eve of Four

The other night I was tucking Charlie in, and he said "Mama, can we just press pause right here? I like being three, I like being right in this place." My heart got that feeling way deep inside, that ache when you love someone so much it hurts, because I knew exactly what he meant. Life is so sweet right now, the five of us, and the age he's at- it's magical. He doesn't know that quite yet, but what he does know is how good it feels to be three-year-old Charlie, and how there's a little uncertainty about four. To answer his question I took him in my arms and whispered something about how the best is yet come, and although it feels scary to change and grow up, I promised things would only get better and better.

This is good advice for me too. Sometimes I have a hard time accepting that we'll never be here again. I don't think it's a bad thing, I just love our right now so much that when I think about one day getting rid of our baby stuff, about having all big kids and never a newborn in our home again, it makes me immeasurably sad. And then I watch the video below and a million emotions swirl through me.

Birthday Eves are always a very introspective time for me. I just got home from picking up doughnuts for tomorrow and filling up a massive monster truck balloon, and I'm sitting here thinking a lot about the past years and the upcoming one. I'm thinking back to Charlie as a newborn and meeting him for the first time, a moment that I am so grateful I can recall in vivid detail. I'm remembering so much- his first birthday, his baby laugh, those big blue to brown eyes, and how soft his skin was when I'd rock him to sleep every night.

It's amazing this little guy is turning four tomorrow. He brings SO much excitement and fun to our lives. Right now, at almost-four he's all about trucks (especially monster trucks and car transporters), all things drawing and art, and he loves to dance and listen to music. He's extremely excited about starting soccer for the first time this season, and if you were to ask him what he wanted to be when he grows up, he's tell you a truck drive or a singer. At least that's his answer this week.

So happiest birthday to the funniest, sweetest little dude there ever was. Four is almost here, and like I told Charlie- it's gonna be a good one.

Here's the video I made for Charlie's first birthday. I did one for Henry too, if you'd like to see...and Olive's is of course in the works.




  1. That video is so sweet. It's likely because I have a 10 day old, but it made me ugly cry like a total dork. It is crazy how fast they grow and change.

  2. So sweet! The video made me a bit emotional when seeing Henry and Charlie together. I have a son who will be turning 3 in October and then I'm expecting my 2nd son in October as well. I just can't wait to see my two son's bond and grow together. But I also can't believe how fast my 1st has grown and that he will already be 3 years old. I wish time would slow down sometimes.

  3. So sweet. Where did you get that amazing black gown. Please say it is available still.